Banter is playful teasing, a way to engage light fun conversation and disqualify the girl you’re talking to in order to disarm her. It shows you’re not going to chase her and you’re just there to have fun. Banter is working efficiently when you’re teasing each other in a fun back and forth exchange.

Banter serves the purpose of getting her guard down and putting her in the position where she chases you! She will be more confortable with you and start to feel more attracted to you. It’s like volley ball, she knows you’re making her work for your attention so she’ll volley it right back to you and try to get you to chase her instead. This back and forth is the key to the attraction.

When you use banter, show her you’re not there to be serous. You’re having good time, she can join in or not. You’re just there to be you and have a blast.

The goal is to hold someone’s attention while building attraction, displaying confidence, personality, and get her comfortable enough to open up to you and go into rapport.

The great thing about banter is its playful and not taken seriously so if you didn’t get her the first time, and she’s near you again, you can hit her with some more banter and you may hook her that time.

Here are some things you should avoid when using banter:

1.  Using banter during rapport. The last thing you want to do is ask her what she’s passionate about, she tells you, and you shit all over it with banter! You never want her to open up and then tease her for doing it.

2. Not smiling. You don’t want to just say the lines and not smile. You have to engage her and show her that this is fun. If you say it seriously and don’t smile, you just come off like an asshole.

3. Moving to fast into to rapport. When you move to fast into rapport or display too much interest, you’ll lose her. Keep things light and playful till you get her comfortable and engaged. Once you hook her you can go into rapport.

Here are some examples of great banter lines:

“So do you always go around here trying to pick up on innocent guys like myself?”

“You seriously don’t like that movie? Man, I can’t even talk to you… Security, security, this girl is bothering me.”

A favorite banter line involves the joke of “getting a divorce”. The role-play is so powerful, you actually start evoking real emotions of a relationship in her. You say it after she does something you disagree with.

Here’s an example of a real interaction:

YOU:  We’re getting a divorce!

HER:  You wish we were married!

YOU:  I’m taking the car, the house and the puppy!

HER:  No, not the pup!

YOU:  Yup, he’s mine. You blew it babe, it’s a shame!

HER:  No way, babe! I don’t want a divorce.

What was great about this is she tries turning it around on by saying that you wish you were married. Completely ignore that statement and continue pushing your frame. She eventually just plays along and she starts calling you babe for the night.

Banter is so great and is an all-time favorite part of an interaction. Just have fun with it and you’ll have an awesome night.